Well I survived the first week in February and admit that my mood did improve a bit when I started doing things for myself instead of expecting praise or appreciation. It’s definitely not a habit yet but I chose to do something at work. I felt happier because it was my conscious decision to do it and not someone telling me I had to. I guess it all starts with a small step.
Next up in Remembering Love this month is going to be a challenge for me. The task is Stop Nagging. There have been some issues here lately with homework. More accurately getting homework done. Chores have slipped and I feel like a good part of the time I get with The Kid is asking “did you do this” and “did you do that.”
Honestly riding her doesn’t really get it done any better or faster. It also doesn’t make me happy or her happy. Yes, in an ideal world everything would work like clockwork and there would never have to be a reminder. In my world, things don’t work that way. I’ve decided to stop nagging and help out instead. When we get home, I’m going to sit with The Kid and go through her daily planner with her and help her with homework.
I didn’t say DO her homework, but help her do it. There are several benefits to this. I get to spend more time with her. I get to know more about what she’s learning and doing all day. I get to see where she’s doing well and where she may need extra work. I make sure homework gets done and done right. Plus it can’t be a bad thing for me to get a learning reminder for my brain. Not to mention, work gets done without the grouchiness, nagging and back and forth stuff.
I plan to do the same with chores. When I get ready to clean, I’m going to assign her a task while I do one. She puts away her laundry while I dust. She cleans the mirrors while I clean the shower. She feeds the dogs while I put the dishes in the dishwasher. I think this plan just might work. If all goes well not only will I not nag, but maybe there won’t even be a need to nag.
I’m not sure this plan with work as well with a spouse or significant other. The author had this as one of her tasks in the book and she simplified it into a single word reminder instead of nagging. Things like “laundry”, “trash”, and so on. One word and done. No long drawn out nagging. So if you find yourself nagging, maybe one idea or the other will work for you. Maybe I’ll try both. Hmmm.
Are you as big of a nag as I am? Do you think you can boil your nagging down into a one word reminder?
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